Time to let go ...
He is now an old man who had passed his 60th birthday years ago. He was not as strong as before, both physically and emotionally. His body protested against the cold of the aircondition in the big hall. His heart although beat steadily, almost collapse with the heavy burden he locked inside.Yes, it was harder and he struggled not to show it. Although his heart is about to break into million pieces, he kept a calm face. The ache in his heart is getting painful with every beat ...
She looked at him with love in her eyes. The eyes that were full of wisdom, pride, laughter and this time, sadness. It broke her heart but she cannot let him see how hurt it was to see the hapiness in his face was clearly replaced with sadness. She don't want to remember him this way. She wanted to remember him with huge smile on his face. With pride and joy.
He was her pillar, her guide when she fall into the murky water of confusions. He was her friend when she needed one. A person who listened to her problems and offered the solutions. The solutions too simple but were too complicated for her to see. He was her confidant. But, he was also the person who put her back on line when she strayed.
How could she leave him? How could he let her go?
He nodded at her. It's time, he said. The lady beside him nodded too. It's time, she said.
With heavy heart, she stood. She can't believe this is happening. She can't bear to look at him, so she faced the woman instead. She could see her eyes were red and tears had fallen down the woman's cheeks. The woman dabbed her tears with the end of her scarf but more streaming down, like a plug was suddenly taken off. The woman immediately pulled her into her arms and hugged her tight. She whispered into the woman's ears, please forgive me for all the wrongs I did, for the heartache I caused. The woman whispered back, I forgive you, my darling, please take care.
Her eyes felt grainy and she knew she had to keep her feelings in check immediately. She can't let her tears fall. She had to stay strong. She can't break down and cry. Immediately she broke away from her hug and with heavy heart, approached him.
To love is to let go. Because of this, he let her go. How can he not? She is his daughter. She understood it was the hardest decision she had ever made in her life but her love for him would not dwindle although they would be thousands miles apart because he is her father ...
The sun was so brave this afternoon and shone brightly but clumps of pregnant clouds persistently tried to hide the beautifully bright globe. It was 12.20pm 27 August 2006. We were 20 minutes early when we landed at the Glasgow International Airport tarmac. It was a small airport, maybe the size of Miri or Penang or Kota Baharu airport.